The Secret Formula: Finding Ideal Customer = Finding Ideal Lover

5-min read

“I had been trying to sell to anyone and everyone I could.

While that sounds smart at first, it left me tired, frustrated, and empty inside. ”

A friend of mine introduced me to this book recently: Dotcom Secret by Russell Brunson

Russell Brunson is the co-founder of ClickFunnels that helps tens of thousands of entrepreneurs quickly get their message out to the marketplace.

He has built a following of over a million entrepreneurs, sold hundreds of thousands of copies of his books, popularized the concept of sales funnels and affiliate marketing.

If you are active on social media like Instagram or YouTube, you must familiar with this picture below, many successful influencers and affiliate marketers are proud to get one of these ClickFunnels 2 Comma Club Award.

 If you get one of these 2CC Awards from 2 Comma Club, that means you earned at least $1 Million Inside Your ClickFunnels Funnel.

Well, back to our topic.

The reason I want to bring up Russell Brunson is that I found The Secret Formula he mentioned in his book (which can help you find your niche – aka your target customers), is amazingly similar to the formula to find your ideal lover.

So I made a little comparison in between dating and business, hopefully, it will help you get a better understanding of your target audience, your niche, your customer avatar…or whatever you want to call them.

Here are 4 steps:


Dating: Define Your Ideal Partner

Business: Define Your Ideal Customer

From the height, weight, appearance, hobbies to his/her goals, dreams, values..etc. We all have our own standards when it comes to choosing your significant another half.

You know EXACTLY who do you want to spend your time with.

This is what we need to think about before building any business online or offline.

Ask yourself one question: Who do I want to work with?

“Most of us start with a product idea, never think about who we want as clients, customers, vendors and associates. But these are the people we will be interacting with day in and day out. You’ll most likely spend more time with these people than your own friends and family.”

Trying to sell to anyone and everyone is like playing in the field. As mentioned above, eventually, it will make you tired, frustrated, and empty inside.

According to Dotcom Secrets, there are 4 steps can help you become crystal clear who you want to work with:

1. Who are my dream clients?

2. Who do they look like?

3. What are they passionate about?

4. What are their goals, dreams and desires?

(PS: This works for your dating life too;)

For example:

My ideal customer: Kristina

Gender: female

Age: between 25-30

Profession: ambitious office lady in an international enterprise

She pursues a fashionable and healthy lifestyle.

Likes to travel, outdoor sports, music and social.

She values her personal growth over money, wants to achieve financial freedom.

Likes to help others.

Then download an image on Google that looks like the person in your mind, and put where you can see it easily.


Dating: Chasing Tail

Business: “Stalk” Your Customer

Now you need to spend time to get to know your target audience.

Here are 4 exercises:

Exercise 1. Find 5 successful influencers in your niche and follow them (Global: Instagram, YouTube; China: Weibo, Red)

Exercise 2. Find out how are these influencers providing values to their raving fans

For example:

1. Tony Robbins – live webinars, podcasts, speech, videos, books, messages, etc.

2. Gary Vaynerchuk – videos, podcast, messages, speech, etc.

3. Russell Brunson – videos, speech, books, products, etc.

4. Tom Bilyeu – videos, speech, books, products, etc.

5. Neil Patel – videos, blog, speech, books, products, etc.

Exercise 3. Join 5 Facebook groups in your niche through Exercise 2., if you’re in China, try to find 5 WeChat groups to join.

Exercise 4. Engage in the group conversation and write down the questions people are asking in the group.


Dating: Attract The One

Business: “Bait” Your Customer

Suppose you meet the one, what actions will you take to get close to him/her?

Will you get their attention by dolling up, working out, or improving yourself? Or will you try to get their phone number and ask them out?

Everyone has their own ways to approach.

This is called “the bait” in business.

Once you know where your target audiences are, you want to make sure to create THE RIGHT BAIT to attract them.

Bait is not uncommon in our lives: free samples, free giveaways, books, online training, free webinars, etc. are all considering as bait.

In order to create the right bait, you will need to find out what are your target audiences looking for, what are their pain and struggles?

For example:

Kristina, who has worked in a 9-5 for many years.

She considers herself as living a good life: travelling occasionally, eating healthy, socializing on the weekends.

But she doesn’t have much time to spend with her family, her 9-5 job makes her feel unfulfilled.

She also needs to make more money to support the family and pay back her mortgage.

Now, she is actively looking for new opportunities, learning new skills.

She wants to change.

Imagine if you were Kristina, now I offer you a free course to teach you how to earn a passive income through e-commerce or affiliate marketing. Would you be interested to learn?

99% of people will be willing to sign up for the course.

Thus, you successfully created the right bait to attract your ideal customers.


Dating: Keep The One

Business: Keep Your Customer

A good relationship is NOT about how big is your house, how many sports cars you have, or how great you look with 6 packs on your stomach.

A good relationship is about how you can unconditionally love each other, take care of each other, grow together to achieve your goals.

As Rusell Brunson mentioned:

A business is NOT about products and services. 

A business is about what RESULT you can get for your clients.


What result do you want to give your customers?

What would you do to make sure your customers get the result they want?

1. Help them write down their goals

2. Making a Stage & Strategy Plan

3. Take Action

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